I haven't written in months and it's not because I forgot to, it's because shit has been buckwild.
Like, completely buckwild. Not "Oh deary me, look how busy I am as I visit friends and go to clubs and study a little and stuff", but completely and utterly crazy. Ie. Buckwild.
A lot has happened. Here is a list.
A LIST OF THING THAT HAVE HAPPENED:
22/12/2011
09/08/2011
Flying isn't always fun
The other day I officially went insane. I even started pulling out my hair - just so I could roll it into little balls that I shoved in my ears, to block the incessant drone I had to live through.
On my flight back to Cape Town there were two people sitting behind me who decided that they were besties. We had been flying for 1 hour and 34 minutes and they didn't keep quiet for more than 8 seconds. They weren't even talking quietly. You'd have thought that they were on opposite sides of the aisle, not 15cm apart.
It doesn’t help that the guy had the most nasal, whiny voice I've ever heard. He made Karen from Will and Grace sound like a gentle nightingale who could serenade you to sleep.
On my flight back to Cape Town there were two people sitting behind me who decided that they were besties. We had been flying for 1 hour and 34 minutes and they didn't keep quiet for more than 8 seconds. They weren't even talking quietly. You'd have thought that they were on opposite sides of the aisle, not 15cm apart.
It doesn’t help that the guy had the most nasal, whiny voice I've ever heard. He made Karen from Will and Grace sound like a gentle nightingale who could serenade you to sleep.
18/07/2011
The Airport
So I'm sitting at the airport waiting for my flight to board to go see my family in Durban. There is something truly great about airports and as I sit here, watching people meander around, I begin to wonder if I could get away with taking pictures of them. That “CLIIIIIIIIIIIIIICCCCCCCKKKK” whenever I try take my stalker shots results in awkward stares and could lead to a lawsuit one day.
Airports are a hub of emotion. A place where all stereotypes of society come together. There is always that couple standing right at the entrance to the departures lounge. They embrace one another, no not embrace, they are trying with all their might to push themselves so closely together that they become one mangled human being - with four limbs, two heads, but awwwww, one heart. Vomit. They are so repulsively slobbering in each other’s faces, that I have the urge to close the eyes of the stranger child standing in the queue behind me.
Airports are a hub of emotion. A place where all stereotypes of society come together. There is always that couple standing right at the entrance to the departures lounge. They embrace one another, no not embrace, they are trying with all their might to push themselves so closely together that they become one mangled human being - with four limbs, two heads, but awwwww, one heart. Vomit. They are so repulsively slobbering in each other’s faces, that I have the urge to close the eyes of the stranger child standing in the queue behind me.
16/05/2011
Ow, you punched my boob
“Hey there, I was just wondering how much a back massage is?”
“Uhh…. *silence*… umm…. We don’t do those.”
“What?”
“Umm… we don’t do umm… butt massages, sorry.”
This was definitely going to be a good time.
The other night, The BestFriend and I trotted to the "Happy Feet Traditional Asian Massage Parlour". I hate the word parlour. It makes me think of herpes, crabs and bad smells.
“Uhh…. *silence*… umm…. We don’t do those.”
“What?”
“Umm… we don’t do umm… butt massages, sorry.”
This was definitely going to be a good time.
The other night, The BestFriend and I trotted to the "Happy Feet Traditional Asian Massage Parlour". I hate the word parlour. It makes me think of herpes, crabs and bad smells.
03/03/2011
I.Hate.Pedestrians.
I am not an angry person. I’m quite cheerful, even in the mornings. I don’t sulk, I don’t get irrationally angry – unless I drink too much gin - and I remain calm in stressful situations. There are only two things that truly peeve me off beyond control. They take hold of the frontal lobe of my brain and contort it into a manic and fizzing ball of anger and resentment:
Shit drivers and equally shit pedestrians
16/02/2011
Hi there, I'm GypsyFeet
I haven’t written in a while. Probably ‘coz the BossLady said that she isn’t marking our blogs anymore since she's busy with the new troop of First Years. Today I felt something was lacking in my life and I realised it was the fact that I missed writing about stuff that interested me. So here goes nothing, a bit of a life update:
1. I’m a Proud Mom
I was drunk the other night! Gasp! Who does that? Off we trotted home at around 4am from Fez to my friend's house to find some food. And I quite literally stumbled across a cat. “Shhhee hash’nt got a howme” I was told. “She waz jusht like, like left here in the garden. Her name is Jezabelle.” Jezabelle? Like the slut? I immediately picked up the cat and took it home. It felt like a magnificent idea at the time. I renamed the cat Bella (no, not Twilight Bella, JezaBELLE-kinda Bella) and went to sleep. I woke up at 7am and thought about how strange my dreams were until I rolled over and found a cat staring me deeply in the eyes. Fuck.
Bella can breakdance
15/01/2011
2011 Nerves
I’m on holiday. It’s quite lovely and I'm enjoying it thoroughly. However I am plagued by irrational dreams (nightmares) about starting college again in roughly two weeks.
Throughout my childhood I was always nervous before going back to school. These nerves have followed me through my teenage years, into semi-adulthood and now into whatever you call yourself when you hit 22.
Throughout my childhood I was always nervous before going back to school. These nerves have followed me through my teenage years, into semi-adulthood and now into whatever you call yourself when you hit 22.
06/01/2011
New Years Shmnew Shmears
For weeks I have been trying to remember last years’ New Years’ resolution without any luck at all. Whilst searching in my cupboard for a pen to write this very blog, I found myself eye to eye with a glimmering bottle of vodka, which was staring me down, calling me stupid and daring me to drink it. It was being mean. I then remembered.
The realisation that my pathetic attempt at a resolution last year, and for the past 4 years, has been to stop drinking so much, whacked me smack-bang in the middle of my alcohol-infused kidneys.
I’m sick of resolutions which I can’t keep. Especially ones which I don’t want to keep and just say I’m going to do because it makes me feel like a better person. Because when I break them, I feel worse. And that’s no fun at all.
The realisation that my pathetic attempt at a resolution last year, and for the past 4 years, has been to stop drinking so much, whacked me smack-bang in the middle of my alcohol-infused kidneys.
I’m sick of resolutions which I can’t keep. Especially ones which I don’t want to keep and just say I’m going to do because it makes me feel like a better person. Because when I break them, I feel worse. And that’s no fun at all.
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